I spent the rest of the day wondering why I was so stressed. I really didn't have any deadlines. No bills. No where I had to be. I wondered exactly when the last time I had truly "relaxed" was. I thought maybe two years ago when we went to the mountains and stayed in a cabin. But, that wasn't it. I was tense the whole time. One, worrying about money. Two, driving up and down the mountain scared me to death. And three, that the weekend would be over too soon and my relaxing vacation was over all too quickly. So I guess I can truly say that I am one of these crazy Americans she was talking about.
I asked for a ton of books for Christmas. I have decided to add to my new years resolution- try to relax. Do you ever feel that when we think we are going to try to relax that we only add to the stress? I find myself worrying about where I'll fit it in and exactly what does one do to relax.
I guess to relax, the first thing you have to do, is let go. I listened to a sermon while I was working this week. The one thing he said that caught my attention was,"Is this going to eternity matter". Is this going to matter in a week. Is this going to matter tomorrow. Is this going to matter 10 minutes from now. We get so caught up in those moments that we forget what really matters." I felt as though it was the thing I needed to hear the most. He said that we are so caught up in the "right now kind of thinking" that life has passed us by. We are so busy thinking that all this matters that we go in to debt, we make mistakes, teenagers get pregnant. All because of "right now kind of thinking".
I have truly forgotten how to relax. So I guess as I lay my head on my pillow tonight, I am going to lay here with my eyes closed and just breath, count my blessings, and be.
Sometimes its important to work for that pot of gold. But other
times it's essential to take time off and to make sure your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow.-Douglas Pagels
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